Is it your profession?
When people call you as a Doctor/Architect etc. Is that what your identity is? Almost everybody has a profession, even if you think you belong to an elite or unique profession, you’re not the only one on Earth. Sometimes people tell their profession even without being asked, because they get a big paycheck or they worked so hard for the qualification. Sometimes, the description about one’s self becomes limited to his job title or his company. There are people who choose a profession because of their parents. Gone are the days where we used to inherit nose/chins/cheekbones, nowadays inheriting Profession is the one which is becoming normal. The son of two lawyers might be pushed to pursue law, all emphasis might be on becoming a good lawyer rather than becoming a good human. But the fact is, one’s self worth can never be restricted to his professional identity.
Is it your hobby?
When people say, “that guy plays guitar”, “she paints” etc. , is it really their identity? Nowadays a person who is just mediocre in a particular skill doesn’t hesitate to brag about it. Today almost everyone is a photographer. Having the luxury to shoot good pictures in a cheap SmartphoneCamera gives them wings. The next hot category is the people who call themselves as an influencer. The rate at which influencers are increasing is so rapid that there will be so many influencers and nobody to influence in few years.
Is it your dad/family?
This is the worst part. When your dad is Rich and Popular, then that’s it! Someone mentioning you as ‘Arre, ye toh Suraj Mehta ka bachcha h.’ That’s the worst way of being identified. One set of people are working hard to get out of being called as ‘Suraj Mehta’s son/daughter’ & that’s a good intention. And the other set of people are taking pride in that. To those people, I would say you all didn’t win any competition before your mother became pregnant, so that you took birth in a rich family. It is all random. Your dad’s portfolio or his Sedan or any other material things you possess whether or not you earned it, can never become your inner self-identity.
Is it your physique?
I clearly don’t understand why Gymming & Success have become synonymous. Firstly, people should brain tattoo that success isn’t only about having developed muscles. Hitting the gym used to be only about keeping body in shape and developing muscles, losing weight etc, but now they give TED-Level motivation to others. Motivational posters have a hulk like body builder in their background with nerves coming out of his biceps and the quote goes “Work hard in silence, let the success make your noise”. Now there’s a trend where humans in the background of success quotes are aesthetically pleasing, they have good hair, properly groomed, their biceps are trying to come out of their well tailored suit when the guy is trying to come out of his Lamborghini. Can’t an oversized fat bald guy or a skinny nerd talk about success if he’s successful in some way? The benefit of hitting the gym and building muscles is restricted to it’s own health benefits and it’s a small part of your life and having a great physique cannot be a life time achievement. It’s going to be your routine if you’ve to retain it. And you don’t post your shirtless pic with a caption saying “Good things come to those who sweat”. People feel they’ve achieved something in life. They speak about success when it has nothing to do with your oversized chest & triceps. Your fitness level can never be your true identity!
Your real identity lies in your ‘PERSONAL VALUES’
When someone says, she will move mountains for her friend, that’s her identity.
When someone says, he will end up dying but will never become a traitor or betrayer, that’s his identity.
Let them call you an Engineer, let them call you a Pianist, but being termed as the sweetest person someone has ever met is a bigger achievement, being identified as trustworthy is a bigger achievement.
When people appreciate you for your loyalty, when friends can count on you, when they find you supportive, all these things hold up your Integrity! Even the smallest of things you do, define you as a person, and that includes being good when nobody’s watching, not intentionally harming someone, respecting a person who deserves respect, irrespective of his race or the work he does.
A good life is for sure built up on values. Good humans would like to have deep meaningful relationship with people who have good values and not with some random doctor or a body builder or a rich businessman’s son.
People are craving people of Transparency, Originality & Authenticity. Be one. That’s where your real identity lies.
To laugh often and much; To win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; To earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; To appreciate beauty, to find the best in others; To leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch, or a redeemed social condition; To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded.– Ralph Waldo Emerson